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Safety In Your Own
Residence
When you make the decision to end an abusive
relationship and you plan to stay in your residence, you will
need to take other precautions. You may need to obtain a protective
order or peace order, both of which are court documents that
provide relief to women who are experiencing abuse. Your local
District court and/or local domestic violence agency can help
you with this. All protective orders order an abuser to stop
threatening or committing abuse. They also require an abuser
to end all contact with the victim. However, a protective
order does not guarantee your safety. In addition, there are
other precautions you should take (SAMHSA, 2003):
- Change the locks on all doors and windows, and
install or improve security to include better outside
lighting.
- Purchase rope/chain ladders to permit escape from
a second story window, if it becomes necessary.
- Talk to all childcare providers and schools about
who has permission to pick up the children.
- Use your community domestic violence resources
for legal advice.
- Cover the mailbox with brightly colored paper to
make it easier for the police to find the house if
you live in a rural area where only the mailbox can
be seen from the street.
- Keep the protective or peace order with you at
all times.
- Tell your neighbors or landlord that your partner
no longer lives with you and ask them to call the
police if they see him at your home.
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Safety on the Job
IPV/DV doesn't just occur in the home. According to the National
Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV, n.d.b):
- For women in 2003, the 2nd leading cause of death
on the job was homicide.
- Of the approximately 1 million women who are stalked
each year, about one quarter admit to missing work
because of the stalking, on average 11 days per year.
" 65% of respondents in a recent survey reported that
a co-worker had been harassed by an intimate partner.
- One study of female domestic violence victims were
left without transportation when the abuser disabled
their car or took the keys.
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Healthcare providers should counsel patients that safety
may be increased if her/his boss and coworkers were informed
about the IPV/DV situation. Employers and coworkers may be
able to provide needed assistance. If there is an Employee
Assistance Program available through the employer, an appointment
with a mental health professional can be helpful. There may
be increased safety in having more people knowledgeable about
and willing to assist in the patient's safety (SAMHSA, 2003).
- Make sure that the victim's workplace is listed
on the protective order. Make sure that the employer
and the security people at the workplace have copies.
Providing a photo of the abuser may also be helpful.
- Review the safety of the parking lot or garage.
Arrange for someone to walk with the victim to and
from the parking lot and the office.
- Whenever possible, attempt to move to another,
less visible space if the victim's workplace: office
or desk can be seen from the street or parking lot.
- Rearrange the work schedule of the victim, so that
arrival and departure times vary.
- Add caller ID to the victim's phone service and
save all faxes and/or e-mails that may give legal
proof that the abuser is disobeying the no-contact
rule of the protection order.
- Review the safety of the childcare plan. Make sure
the protective order includes all important addresses.
This would also include the address of the schools
and/or day care facilities attended by any children.
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Case Study
#4. Rita (Continued)
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| Since Rita and Toby moved in with her sister, Cliff
has been calling her repeatedly on her cell phone and
threatening her. He's been to the house several times,
pounding on the doors, trying to get into the house. She
went to the police department to file an Order of Protection
against Cliff, including limiting his ability to contact
her by phone, mail or come anywhere near her and her son
at her sister's house, at work or at Toby's school. She
talked with her boss at work and provided a photo of Cliff,
so that the receptionist will call the police if Cliff
comes into the building. None of this has stopped Cliff.
Yesterday when she went to the grocery store, Cliff was
in the parking lot, he grabbed her arm and tried to make
her get into his car. She screamed and tried to get away
from him. Cliff only let go and left in his car when 2
men came over (they happened to be off duty police officers)
and asked if she was ok. Today, Rita's boss called her
to let her know that Cliff had been seen walking outside
the building and that the police had been called; Cliff
left before they arrived. Her coworkers have answered
several calls from Cliff, telling him that Rita is unable
to come to the phone. Rita is shaken and scared, wondering
when this was going to end. |
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